Hey Friend 👋

⭐️ Insight

In Sixth form, I was voted the shiest student of the year. Being introverted, I dreaded interacting in social situations. Growing up, I was extremely shy. The thought of speaking with people made my heart race. I would overthink and worry what others might think. Speaking with confidence didn’t come to me naturally.

At Medical school, my tutors commented I was quiet. I felt almost paralysed to speak during group discussion. I was part of a group of peer mentors for international students. We were asked to speak in a Lecture Theatre filled with over 400 students. None of the mentors wanted to step on stage and speak. It was quite overwhelming and none of us were prepared to speak in front of a large audience at short notice.

I don’t know exactly why but I reluctantly volunteered to speak. It was a nerve-racking experience. I didn’t know what to say and could hardly articulate my words. In my head, this was terrible. Walking back from that embarrassing situation, a switch flipped in my mind. I said to myself this will never happen again. That was a pivotal moment.

So many people are terrified of public speaking (including me). Did you know people would prefer dying to speaking in public? I knew not overcoming my fear of public speaking was in the way of fulfilling my potential.

Developing new skills from scratch was hard. Like every other skill, to get good at public speaking, one needs to practise and adjust. I practised at every opportunity I could and sought feedback.

Have you ever felt self-conscious? I used to care so much what others might think. I overestimated what people noticed I was doing. This phenomenon is known as the spotlight effect. In fact, most people paid far less attention as what I thought. I stopped worrying about what others might think and started to focus on the message I need to convey.

Working on my verbal and non-verbal communication was vital in order to speak with confidence. Tone of voice, speed of words and body language were some of the things I had to improve.

Recently, a GP trainee told me I speak slowly which is an accurate observation. When people are nervous, they tend to speak fast and don’t control their breath. Confident people are not afraid to speak slowly. They articulate their words and are comfortable with silence and pause. Next time, you find yourself becoming nervous, try decreasing your pace.

Developing my communication skill has opened a wide range of opportunities. I started to receive invitations to speak with at conferences. One of the highlights was meeting Roger Neighbour who happened to be speaking at the same conference I was booked. He is a retired GP, former Covenor of the Panel of MRCGP Examiners and past President, RCGP, UK. If you want to learn more about his work, I interviewed him not too long ago. Watch the full interview​

Overcoming shyness has unleashed my confidence and this has been life-changing in itself. If you told me a few years ago I was one skill away from changing my life, I would find it hard to believe. I hope my story inspires you to believe in yourself and find the breakthrough you are looking for.

Quote I’m pondering on

"You are one skill away from transforming your life."

Question for you

I'm curious to know what one skill is holding you back from a brighter future?

😂 Fun fact

Do you know what Bill Gates, Barack obama and Elon Musk have in common? All three are introvert.